I guess I should’ve knocked on wood before posting yesterday. Last night I dreamt of him and them. Him meaning the one who viciously reaped me and them being the ones whom protected him until a few weeks ago. It was strange. I was in a supermarket, looking at cans of God only knows than all I sudden I began sobbing. They came to greet me as I fought against them.

They told me, ‘I believe you. We’ll check the cameras and get him good.’ and I gazed at them astounded by their words before rising. On my feet, out of the blue there was my sister, holding me, and consoling every tear and then there was him, walking with someone that I could not distinguish as male or female, talking and acting as if all was right with the world.

As we walked past them I glared. He acted as if he didn’t see me but while looking still in their direction at the back of him I screamed, ‘I HATE YOU!’ and it was then he finally acknowledge my presence. I felt empowered knowing he knows. When I awoke I was frightened but than as I settled back into the comfort of my flashlight lighting up the white wall I easily fell back asleep again. For once I felt safe.

My dreams have left vacancies in my head. I haven’t had not a single coherent one that I can remember aside from a part of another. I had a large gash across my wrist and it didn’t bleed at all though it felt deep but it burned like nothing else. I didn’t scream for help I just watched blankly and when I awoke my wrist still felt like it was on fire. I am some what thankful for the absence of dreams. I don’t startle as much or feel as if I’m right there in the center being swallowed. Still, I don’t sleep any better. I am just as listless. Sometimes I am up every hour on the hour or I toss and turn for hours on end. I nap during the day if I can though. Even amongst all this restlessness the nights feel more peaceful and that I am thankful for.